We were rescheduled to Saturday, April 21, 2012. The plan was to arrive at 8pm just in time for Nurse D to start her shift with us. The other hope was that by coming in at night we had a smaller chance of being rescheduled on again!
We were given the best gift because the second nurse we had with Addi who no longer works at this hospital was in town and offered to come be our Doula. Our doctor was not the on-call doctor, but said he would come in for us so that was a huge relief. All three were going to be there for us...we actually pulled off the "dream team".
Saturday, Brian had to work and I had planned to get a lot done around the house. I pretty much did nothing because there was just so much on my mind. I went out with my mom for a bit and then came home and tried to take a nap. Brian got home form work and we just kind of sat together trying to take in what this night could mean for us. I made the call to Labor and Delivery to make sure we were still "on" and to my surprise we were! They said it would be okay to eat first so Brian and I went out for out "last meal". We decided to try a new place called "Mac and More", it seemed fitting for our "Mac".
|The tables are chalk boards so this is what Brian wrote|
|I think I had like 6 bites...nervous!|
It was hard to eat because so much was on my mind, I just couldn't fully comprehend that this was real and happening. We pulled into the hospital and both felt nervous and sick to our stomachs. Brian didn't even want to unload all of our things from the car "just in case". We walked into the hospital and sat down at the sign in desk. The lady made the comment that this must not be our first baby because we were "so calm". Psh as if she had any clue how I was feeling on the inside! But she was right, this was not our first baby.
It took almost a half hour to get signed in because of this new computer system the hospital has. When we were finally let back into L&D, we both took a big breath in and walked through those doors hand in hand. Our hearts were pounding, minds racing, but we were doing this and we were doing it together. We were given a room we had never been in before, which we were okay with. As we got closer to the nurses station we saw our Doula and were able to give her the biggest hug. The last time I hugged her was the day she took Addi away for the very last time. My trust in her is too high for words. Before we were even done hugging out came nurse D. More hugging. In that moment my anxiety was gone and I felt like we were in the very best hands...Mason was in the very best of hands and things were going to be okay this time.
We walked into our room, the four of us and there were flame less candles all around, birthday streamers and a present for Mason. They said they were ready to have a birthday party and it was so beautiful, so peaceful, so what I needed.
|You can't really tell how cute it was by the pictures, but it was!|
|This was a beautiful site...we didn't have a need for this last time :(|
I changed into the hospital gown and was not nearly as freaked out as I thought I would be. It turned out that I wasn't dilated as much as they thought so we started with misoprostol. Basically a pill was inserted in my
The next morning I got up and curled up with Brian on the couch. I just needed to be close to him. When our nurse came in she had a plan of action. I was dilated to a 4. We started with the pitocin about 8am and around 10am my doctor arrived to break my water. I don't remember how it felt when it was broken with Addi, but this time I was amazed at how much there really was. Everything was calm and easy. Seeing my doctor just made me feel so at ease.
My plan was to go as long as possible without the epidural because I didn't want to slow my labor down. What I didn't realize was that once my water was broken my contractions would go from 0 to 60. I made it about 45 minutes before I was begging for the epidural. Not my best in the holding out category, but the contractions were coupling and when you have them back to back like that, there is no time to recover before the next one hits. As soon as I got my epidural I expected to feel better, but much like last time it was not working on my left side.
|Didn't get a picture when they were at their worst, but you get it. (Mine was the middle section).|
|Love me some epidural!|
|Since we are stuck here let's pose for pictures...oh jeez! (My parents with us) Doo doo doo waiting, waiting, waiting.|
When everyone came back from lunch they seemed a little more serious and once I saw our doctor putting on all the gear it occurred to me that this was really happening!
Pushing this time was different and we were all more serious about it. Brian was amazing just like last time. So encouraging and right there with each pushing holding me up and coaching me.
|I'm thinking...is this really happening?!?|
And then at 2:51pm after approximately 5 hours of active labor he was here...ALIVE! His cry was the best noise I have ever heard.
|Our first look at each other|
|Sweet relief (side note: my pillow case was made by a friend and has flip flops on it).|
|And then there were four (I love that you can see Brian is wearing his Addison bracelet in this picture).|
When Mason was placed on my stomach it took just a moment for him to cry, but when he did it was everything I was waiting for. I couldn't believe that he was here, alive and safe. I was able to have him on my chest for the recommended two hours of bonding and then nursing. I felt bad Brian couldn't hold him right away, but I felt so lucky in that moment. I didn't just get a living baby, but I got the ideal birthing scenario. I know not everyone gets that and I was grateful for it all, the easy/fast birth, complication free, our medical staff we wanted, my family and a healthy baby who never spent a moment in the NICU. I was/am completely aware and grateful for each aspect.
I just stared into his eyes...his wide open and bright blue eyes. Listening to his cry and soaking it all in. I was in such shock. I didn't expect things to go so fast and I didn't expect things to go so smoothly...surely something would go wrong right?!?
I know the look on my face was not what people were expecting, but I just couldn't comprehend that things went okay, great even. Had Addison been there it would have been perfect, but it was as "perfect" as it gets and I am grateful.
I started this post only 6 days after Mason was born and I am just getting around to finish it so I between that and already being super long I will write more later, but I needed to get back this part finished first.