How Far Along: 38 weeks (our baby is as big as a Pumpkin). We are checking in at the hospital in less than 2 hours and I still don't believe it.
Maternity Clothes: Hopefully not for much longer!
Movement: Pretty good, but also had a couple freak out moments.
Gender: A brother for Addison, Mason Alexander.
Symptoms: Runny nose always. Braxton hicks contractions daily. I am still only getting up to pee once per night. I can't believe that never really changed.
Cravings: Nothing really sounded especially great this week, but now that I can't eat anything before going to the hospital some eggs and toast sound so good!
Belly Button In or Out: Still in.
Best Moment this week: Getting our maternity pictures taken was nice to cross off the to-do list.
Freak-out of the week: There were several. This started out as another hard week for Brian and I. It got better, but then we had our amnio yesterday,which caused panic and then the results...more on that later.
What I miss: I miss that I wasn't able to enjoy this pregnancy. Always grateful it, but just couldn't enjoy it the way I would have if I didn't live in the world where babies die.
What I am looking forward to: Meeting our son.
Next Appointment: Not really an appointment...just going in to be induced!
Something Else: Oh what a week! This is not one I would choose to relive!
Friday we met with our doctor and I was still only dilated between a 1-2. He brought up some policy changes in their office starting with an amnio being required for anyone delivering before 39 weeks. While I was not opposed to the amnio he also wanted my thoughts on waiting until 39 weeks. He was just doing his job, but the doubt I felt in my ability to wait another week and the fear I had in delivering too early almost made me break down right there. Brian said I looked like I would cry at any moment.
Saturday we had a cleaning/organizing party where my mom, sister and Sarah came over to help me get things ready. It was really nice to have the extra hands. Before that I took both Brian's truck and my CRV into have the car seats installed. it took forever since I had to drive one and then come back for the other. The good news is that they are in and ready to go...for a second time...please let them get used this time. That evening Brian and I argued over a new project he wanted to start...umm we have like a million more important things to do. Anyways it was another stresser for both of us. We got over it and that seemed to be the end of our problems with each other.
Sunday we went out with our friend Lyndsey to take maternity pictures. She took the ones we did with Addison too. We didn't do anything too crazy, just one location and I am pretty happy with what we got. I can't believe we almost didn't do them! After that we went to the baby CPR class that we tried to take THREE times with Addi. It got canceled every time before. When we got to the hospital, we went to the room and there was one other couple waiting....no class AGAIN! We eventually found out that they had just moved rooms. I was so glad to finally take this class and get it over with. Not to mention we met a really nice couple there!
Monday was my little brother's 19th birthday so Brian went out with the boys and I got some more things done around the house.
Tuesday I had another NST and a nice evening with the fam at dodgeball. Our team in now 6-0. Seriously SO much fun to watch! I stood the entire time hoping to get some extra contractions.
Yesterday was the amnio. I felt okay about it until that morning or I should say the middle of the night when I kept getting up. I felt like my head was okay about everything, but my body was freaking out. I felt so nauseous and terrible. I also knew I would be going my myself because Brian had to work (I had multiple people offer to go, but it's kind of a Brian or nothing thing for me). Anyways it was an odd morning and I couldn't even remember if I had fed the dogs or not. I called Brian on my way to the doctor and he said he was able to take his lunch at 9:30am just so he could make it. I felt bad about that, but was glad to have him. I knew it was going to hurt, but I was more concerned about possibly hitting Mason with the needle or any other bad outcome. Once the needle was in, it hurt, but not as bad as I thought. The worst part was that it had to stay there because Mason moved his foot and we had to wait for him to move. The needle in your uterus causes it to contract and is very uncomfortable. Plus the position I was in was making me feel sick, but of course I couldn't move. I started feeling light headed and like I would be sick. It felt like it took 10 minutes, but it was probably only 2-3. After that I had an NST. Everything was good and I was released to go back to work. It took a good 2 hours before I was feeling like myself again.
We got the results and Mason scored a 45...this is considered transitional. We were really hoping for a clear "green light". This is not immature, but it isn't mature either. Brian and I had quite the decision to make. I talked to several nurses at the office and cried. We talked about it with our family and later was able to talk to our doctor and each of the nurses that took care of Addison and I...like I got a personal phone call at home from all three of them...they are so wonderful! I have so much more to say about this and the agonizing night we had coming up with a decision, but I need to get ready to go to the hospital...so you obviously know the decision we made. It wasn't an easy one, but we made it. I will try to write more if I can. Please send all good thoughts our way today...it's going to be an emotional day to say the very least.